Mum says I’ll break my ankle wearing ‘em, but if she thinks I’m gonna wear those awful Clark’s t-bar shoes she bought me, she’s got another think coming. Oh look, my old red bibbed hotpants! I’d almost forgotten I had those. They’ve kind of gone out of fashion a bit now, but I lived and died in them last summer. To be honest, I’m trying to persuade my mum to buy me a mohair tonic skirt. Y’know, that iridescent material that’s all the go at the moment? My mate’s got a suit, but I know I won’t get that so a skirt’s gonna have to do. I’ll need a Ben Sherman to go with it though.I’ve got some t-shirts and things in my dressing table drawers, and if you like, you can have a look through my make-up bag. The glitter eye shadow’s pretty cool, especially the purple one. If you can’t find it on the dressing table it’ll be on the floor next to my hairdryer. Y’know, one of those with a huge plastic hood that fills up with warm air when you attach it to the blower.

I used to wish my mum would buy me a proper hairdryer though, cos getting your hair to flick under at the bottom with one of those isn’t easy y’know, but since I had my hair cut in a DA (duck’s arse - so named because of the layering at the back) I don’t really use it much. Oh, careful! You just knocked my jewellery box down. It’s mostly tat but I like the chokers, especially the royal blue velvet one with a cameo stuck on the front. I wear the mood ring sometimes too.Hold on a second. Don’t open that cupboard or everything’ll fall out. It’s just full of old ‘Jackie’ and ‘Popswop’ magazines and old games. What games? Oh, y’know, the usual sort of thing… mousetrap and ker-plunk are in there, and I think I’ve still got Twister. There’s a pair of clackers in there too, but mum doesn’t like me using them. She says they’re dangerous, that you can break your fingers with ‘em, but I think it’s just the racket they make that she can’t stand. Look… please don’t open it…. Oh no! You’ve gone and found my old Cindy dolls.

No, I don’t play with them anymore, but I haven’t the heart to chuck ‘em either. I used to have a Tiny Tears doll too y’know, but my so-called friend pulled her head off. If you fed her a bottle of water she actually peed herself. Look, why don’t we just listen to some music? I’ve got a cassette player on the shelf and I’ve taped some really good tracks off my albums.

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